


Honeyed Words

by Project0506



Series: Soft Wars [48]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Crack, Fox's potty mouth, Gen, Humor, gen - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-19
Updated: 2020-04-19
Packaged: 2021-03-01 17:27:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23730823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Project0506/pseuds/Project0506
Summary: (CRACK CRACK CRACK)Rex is Leia's favorite Vod.  Who is Luke's?
Series: Soft Wars [48]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1683775
Comments: 43
Kudos: 776





	Honeyed Words

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Kaysco](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaysco/gifts).



> Just a spot of crack to kick off the writing tonight!
> 
> Edit: added to Soft Wars main because why not? This is now Soft Wars canon

They’re rehearsing the final walkthrough of The Harek Hellhouse (that name won’t make it live, Gree knows, but _it should_ ) when Fox strolls in with a small child in a jumpscream onsie and a chest harness. The chest harness is attached to one of those extendable leashes; the spring case where the extra lead rolls up is patterned in little purple lightsabers.

The little jumpscream ears keep flopping into the kid’s face.

If Gree thought he had anyone’s attention before, that’s long gone.

“Vod,” he groans. Fox, as expected, ignores him.

“Anyone execute the original contractors yet?” he gripes instead. Gree really wishes Fox would stop saying things like that. Some of his fans are _obsessive_ ; they’re actually going to end up with a body at some point. And worse, _litigation._

Fox is entirely on his own, if that happens. The child toodles around their ankles.

‘ _Clan, question_ ’ Gree signs briskly. He hands Fox a holopad with their schedule.

‘ _Torrent,_ ’ Fox confirms. ‘ _Rescue before rabid_.’

They both snort. Yeah. Good luck. Torrent vod are uncorked already wild.

Gree taps his forearm twice, mutters ‘Kot1’ and takes the ‘pad back when Fox is done with it.

“Move the living area shot to end,” is the only change Fox has. “Ponds got me sold on this Golden Hour shit, the light’ll be prime then.” Gree makes a note, hands it off to the Wrangler In Chief to get everyone on schedule and in position.

“ _Oi_ ,” Fox says suddenly. “ _No_.” Somehow, impossibly, the kid has managed to undo one of the clasps on Gree’s boot without Gree even noticing and has proceeded to chew on the hinge. His eyes are huge and blue and overwhelmingly innocent. Karking Torrent.

Fox snaps twice. The kid uses Gree’s foot to push himself to his feet and immediately toddles over to Fox’s extended hand. His leash appropriately spools up.

Ah, starting training them early then. Gree approves.

“We don’t eat fucking boots,” Fox grouses. “Especially not somebody else’s. Somebody get me some fucking fruit over here.”

“Fuh,” the child says, very seriously.

“And that’s another thing,” Fox bitches as he retreats, whisking his armful towards the refreshments. “Your buir will bust my _balls_ if you crack that one out, understand? You keep that between us. Don’t fuck it up.”

“Bah,” the child agrees.

“Better.”

**Author's Note:**

> 1\. Strength. If this is your first time dabbling in this little universe of mine, know that this is an in-joke that started [here](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23407009). Back  
> 


End file.
